Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Samantha's Dating Thought: Cell Phones And Dating Etiquette

I am always surprised to find that many people seem oblivious to the fact that it is rude to be on a cell phone during a date. I cannot emphasize this enough—it is very bad form to spend your date staring at your cell phone screen instead of paying attention to whomever you are with.

Follow these three rules to keep your dating etiquette in check:
  • Turn your phone on silent, and keep it in your pocket or purse. It is never acceptable to keep it on the dinner table. 
  • If you are expecting an urgent or otherwise very important phone call, tell your date up front so that he or she doesn't take it personally. 
  • If you feel an overwhelming urge to text, tweet, Facebook, Instagram, etc., excuse yourself to the restroom.
Don't be rude.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

10 Types of Friends Who Are Toxic to Your Dating Life

(Originally appeared on The Huffington Post on May 17, 2013.)

Have you ever wondered if you have friends in your life who are inhibiting you from meeting a great guy? Have you ever really considered which of your friends are truly good friends to you, like you are to them, and have your real best interests at heart? There is something to be said for going out on the town with the right kind of friends, friends who care about you, want you to meet someone great and help you look and feel your very best. If you are truly serious about meeting the One, it's time to take stock of your gals and get rid of these toxic friend types:
Are your friends hurting your dating life?

Miss Centerstage: This girl somehow always finds a way to make her stuff and herself seem better than whatever you have going on, especially when guys are around. She is the friend who shows up right as he is asking you for your number and makes herself seemmuch more interesting than you. And, then he promptly forgets all about you. Even on YOUR birthday, she figures out how to get all the attention. This girl is blowing your rap, so now you need to blow her out of your social circle.

Miss I Already Dated That Guy: This girl has been around the block a few times when it comes to dating. She has been out with just about every guy there is and she has somechoice words to share about each and every one of them. The result is that you fail to pursue many men because she "knows that you will never like him." This girl is not good for your posse; you need to make your own observations about the men you meet.

Miss Can't Handle Her Booze: This girl is basically a drunk, even as she sits there innocently sipping her white wine spritzer. She is always making a huge scene and needsmucho attention. Eventually, she scares off all the men. You know what you should doabout this friend.

Miss Blabbermouth: This girl just cannot keep a secret. She doesn't understand girl codeor the definition of the word private. This girl is a walking time bomb because you never know what is going to come out of her mouth that might embarrass you or put you in an awkward situation. If you keep this friend in your life, be very careful about the things you tell her, so you don't get caught in a big heap of dog-do.

Miss Always Having A Blonde Moment: This girl is a ditz regardless of her hair color. She has said,

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Samantha's Dating Tip: How To Avoid First Date Butterflies

Do you get nervous before going on a first date? Do not despair; you are definitely not alone. No one is immune to the "first date butterflies". Even the sexiest of girls and the hottest of guys are afflicted! I have found that the one thing people seem to be most worried about is having nothing about which to talk. Luckily, there is an easy remedy: preparation.

Here are three tips on "prep work" you can do prior to a first date:

1. In many ways, a first date is similar to an interview. Accordingly, you can prepare a few questions that you would like to ask your date to keep the conversation flowing. Steer clear of religion and politics, but feel free to dive into family, work, travel, hobbies, etc. However, be sure that your date doesn't turn into an actual interview; give him some time to ask you questions too, and let the conversation flow freely from each question.

2. Everyone has great stories about their lives, but not everyone is good at telling them. Pick a few anecdotes that are fun and lighthearted, and rehearse them prior to your date (orally, or in your head). Travel stories are always interesting to hear (like that time you rode a Vespa in the South of France, or went to New Orleans for Mardi Gras), as well as anything that is funny or unique that has happened to you. And definitely be weary of stories that might put you in a bad light.

3. The day of your date, make sure that you read a newspaper, or at the very least, glance through some news headlines online. If something really important or interesting has happened that day or week, you do not want to draw a blank if your date brings it up in conversation. Furthermore, it will allow you to show off a knowledge of current events. You can lead with, "Did you hear that..."

If you're still nervous about blanking out, you can take some notes on your smartphone to serve as your back-up. Also, if there's an awkward lull in conversation, you can always go with a compliment. People love to be complimented.

Who knows,  with a little "prep work", you may find that you can even enjoy yourself on a first date!

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Hamptons Early Intel: Summer 2013


Old Stove Pub, Bridgehampton, NY
Summer is around the corner and I have some early intel on some of the haunts in the Hamptons...

Opened finally…

Topping Rose (in the heart of Bridgehampton): We waited all last summer for Tom Colicchio's new restaurant, but it never opened. They finally got it together in the fall, so as we go into summer, it should be a-okay.

Old Stove Pub: Believe it or not, it's actually open already. I know, "shocking," but it is. It's under new management, so they managed to get it open before August for once.

New and already open…

Highway Diner (where Rugosa was in Wainscott):  How exciting, a diner further eas. tMenu looks good, it's kid friendly and they even have a root beer float on the menu. 

Mercado (where Agave was, next door to Bridgehampton Commons)-:Mexican again but looks more modern and together. Looks like a good one to try. 

Sad to see it go...

Whole Foods: The Wainscott outpost seems to be gone. What a shame!

Hamptons Players Club: Food was very good here. I wish they could have tried one more season.

Waiting to see…

Sienna Restaurant and Lounge (where Beaumarchais was in East Hampton): I am guessing this is going to be the same scene with just a different name. I never managed to get there last summer, maybe this summer.

BLT Steak (where Nobu was at the Capri Hotel): Since BLT Steak is one of my faves in the city, I am so excited about this opening. And thankfully they are finally closing that overpriced "cafeteria," they were trying to pass off as Nobu. Let's hope the Capri has their deal together this time around. 

Monday, April 22, 2013

Samantha's Dating Tip: Spring Clean Your Dating Life

Spring is definitely in the air. As you clean your closets and put away your gloves and hats, think about  what you could be doing to clean up your dating life. Here are five tips:

  • Over the winter, did you go on a first date with someone about whom you couldn't make up your mind? Consider shooting him a text about meeting up again. You could find that your chemistry heats up with the warmer weather. 
  • Is there someone in your dating life who you continue to see even though you know it cannot, or should not, go anywhere? Throw off the weight of winter and sever ties with this person. Spring is a time for fresh starts. 
  • If you broke up with someone during the winter, use spring as an excuse to chase away your winter blues and become proactive about finding a great new guy. Let all of your friends and family know that you are ready to be set up with any eligible bachelors that they may know. 
  • Can you think of someone you met in the past few months that you are interested in, but he might not know? Take a chance and send him a flirty Facebook message. With some spring in your step, you might just land the man of your dreams. 
  • If you started seeing someone during the colder months and things are going well, think about the next steps you could be taking in your relationship. Plan a springtime getaway, or find a summer vacation rental to go in on together.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

10 Types of Women That Men Do Not Want to Marry

(Originally appeared on The Huffington Post on April 15, 2013.)

I recently wrote an article here on Huffington Post Women entitled 10 Types of Men Who Won't Marry You and in response to it, I have gotten over 1,000 comments as well as endless emails asking me why I hadn't written a similar list of types of women. As a result, I have created such a list here, using the opinions that I have heard from tens of thousands of men during my years working as a matchmaker. The fact is, if you are a woman and you want to get married, you need to be smart about your dating. This means avoiding certain male types, but it also means recognizing what you are doing wrong in your dating and whether the type of woman you are putting out there to the male population attracts or repels them. To figure this out, you can start by considering the list below and whether you, at times, are any of these quite unattractive female types:

Miss "Bossy Pants": This woman usually can't help herself; she has bossy in her DNA. When a man first meets her, he might think this character trait is cute, for awhile. However, once he starts to feel like he is in grammar school being told what to do by his second grade teacher, he will give this woman her walking papers.

Miss "Playing Games With His Heart": This woman thinks that being a game player will help herland a man. However, even though a man might be intrigued by a hard to get lady in the beginning, as soon as he decides that he is interested in her, all he wants is an honest straightshooter. If this woman doesn't remove Battleship from her repertoire quite quickly, she will be shown the door before she can evensink his vessel.

Miss "I Want To Change You": This woman is lurking everywhere. She is the type of woman many men are the most leery of. (Of course, there are some men who love this woman because of their own insecurities.) She claims that she loves her guy just the way he is, but little by little, she chips away at just about everything about him. First, it's his wardrobe, then it's his taste in music. However, when she gets to his friends and his hobbies, she is usually kicked to the curb.

Miss "Suspiciously Jealous": This woman is on edge all the time because she is very distrusting.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Samantha's Dating Thought: Don't Plan Dinner On A First Date


Time is precious, especially when you are single. And the last thing you want is to get stuck at a long dinner with someone for whom you just don't like.

 For this reason, I always advise that first dates be planned for drinks only. This keeps the pressure off because you always have the opportunity to dash off after one drink if you aren't feeling it and if you are feeling it, you can go for a second drink. And then if you are really really feeling it, then you can get dinner. (Or, you can plan dinner for their next date.)

 Have you ever gotten caught in an awful dinner date?