LOVE MATCH... JIM CARREY & JENNY MCCARTHY

Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy


- This is Hollywood’s coolest funny couple. Funny, ha funny! We like them because their love seems fresh, exciting and fun. We like them because they compliment each other not detract from each other. We like them because she is so hot and he is, well funny!

HOOKING UP

Hooking up.


Everybody seems to be doing it in the Hamptons right now, regardless of their age, regardless of the type of relationship they are ultimately looking for. It seems that going out to restaurants like Madame Tongs, Savannahs and Bobby Vans are in actuality just preludes to hooking up. I think that single people trick themselves into thinking that they might meet “their intended” at one of these places, and of course they might, but the probability of this is seeming lower and lower from the stories I am being told lately. More likely, people are finding other people male and female who are ready, willing and able to have a little fun, for the evening, no strings attached, and no contact thereafter. And yes, some people will lay it on thick and try to convince you that it is not just a one night stand and that there all sorts of romantic rose colored possibilities for the two of you in the future.

But, safe bet… don’t buy into the BS, if it sounds like BS, and you are suspicious, be suspicious and take it for what it’s worth- foreplay to a fun evening. If you enjoy, no, crave the flattery and the attention, go for it, but it’s better to go for it when you are being realistic about what it is and what it is NOT going to become than going for it with expectations that are going to cause a lot of obsessing and disappointment.

Some rules for hooking up (Not that I am condoning it or dissing it), just some words of advice…

---Don’t choose someone else’s boyfriend or girlfriend, there are plenty of unattached people in the Hamptons, pick one of those.

---Make sure to end the evening or the morning as it may be with “I had a great time” “That was terrific,” or “Wow, so unexpected” rather than “I’ll call you to go to the beach later” or “Let’s meet out tonight” when you know you are never going to do this.

If you are going out with the intention of hooking up, come prepared with your own transportation. Nothing is worse for you when you have a friend begging you to leave and nothing is worse for them than when they are waiting around while you get action and all they get is aggravated.

As a guy, be prepared to buy drinks for ladies if you intend to woo them, this is expected.

As a woman, if you are looking for a little nooky nooky, don’t stand in a pack of women. Either stand alone, off to the side or with one friend. Men, even players get intimidated to approach large groups.

Smile- this is welcoming and will make someone approach you.

Be careful- regardless of how nice and how expensive someone’s clothes look to you, you never know what is lurking underneath. Use protection, after all, this person is a stranger to you.

CELEB NEWLYWEDS...

Pam Anderson and Kid Rock

Newlyweds at last. This on again off again love affair has spanned more than 5 years having met thru a mutual friend right after Pam divorce from Tommy Lee. We like them because their love has lasted thru turmoil and other couplings yet somehow they found their way back to each other. We like them because they both have an exhibitionist, life of the party side yet deep down they are both into family and keeping it real.

ALL WORK AND NO PLAY- the Devil Wears Prada

ALL WORK AND NO PLAY…. The Devil wears Prada.

We say that love is the most important thing to us, but how often do we let work get in the way of it? Of course, our livelihoods are important, otherwise how would we eat or buy Prada shoes but love is important as well. Afterall, what’s the use of all that money if you have no one to share it with, right?

I saw the Devil wears Prada this weekend. Great fashion movie- loved the Balenciaga dress, the hot Chanel thigh high boots, and the Patricia Fields specially designed brown handbag. Thought Anne Hathaway was great, really a breakout role for her and Meryl Streep was hysterical, I just want to walk around and say “that’s all” in a monotone voice to every person who pesters me, even a little! Adrian Grenier…. I like him better in Entourage, his character in the movie bothered me, a lot- a little too sappy and too unable to control his woman; he couldn’t even get her to celebrate his birthday with him. Clearly work ruined their love affair. Perhaps it was meant to be ruined, perhaps their were just college sweethearts who never had a future in the real world. But the other perhaps is that they were meant to be together and ambition and Hermes got in the way.

So… some tips for keeping your relationship a relationship and working your ass off to get ahead at the same time….

Figure out a way to balance work and play. This will take effort on your part.

Its easier to figure out in advance what time is going to be allottedas personal time because if you just say, you will find the time and don’t earmark specific time, you will always be at your desk at Goldman Sachs and you will never get to see the Philharmonic in the Park or Grucci fireworks in East Hampton.

Make certain you never cancel on the same person more than once unless it is really an emergency (not that an IPO is blowing up but that you have a sick relative or death in the family.) People are tolerant in small doses.

If you cancel more than once, you need to make a grand gesture to salvage your relationship, saying your sorry and that you will make it up to the person is not good enough. Actions speak louder than words so definitely send those flowers, and definitely not red roses, something more special is in order, perhaps Purple Tulips (see Matchbook: the Diary of a Modern Day Matchmaker). Or send candy, not a Twix bar but something glorious like from Maison du Chocolat or better yet show up with something romantic like a wrapped present box with an assortment of spa products from Bliss and a gift certificate for some treatments.

Keep in mind that if your budget does not allow for a grandious expenditure, which might be why you are working your butt off, something sweet and thoughtful can do the apology trick as well. Send a Monk-email, or send a bag of Hershey kisses, you can definitely afford a few e-cards and some Hersheys, well the bag is under $3!!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH MARRIED MEN????

I don't know if there was just something in the air last night or if married men in NY have actually termed Thursday nights as "let's take off our ring night and hit on single girls" and this happens every Thursday night??

All I know is that last night, in a place that shall remain nameless, there were sooooo many married men being really inappropriate. Can I tell you that any of these men wound up cheating on their wives, I can't say, and I have no idea, but what I do know is that they wasted a lot of single women's time.

Married men think that as long as they are innocently flirting that they are not doing anything wrong. I bet their wives would beg to differ. Moreover, forget about these guys’ consciences for a moment, what of the single girls who they are flirting with? Single girls, at least the good ones, don’t want to be hit on by married men, innocently or otherwise, they don’t want to waste their time, however short, talking to a guy who is not available yet leading her to believe that he is.

I used to think that all you had to do was covertly observe his left hand, and if there was ring, then he was unavailable, no ring, available or at least not wedded in holy matrimony. But a lot of these guys, don’t wear a ring, or go so far as to take it off when they are trolling predominantly singles spots. Can we say sooooo inappropriate???

And I am completely in support of a guy’s night out, I think guys should absolutely have nights where they do their guy thing without the ladies. We, ladies want our girl’s night too. And I don’t really need to know what happens on guys nights but I guess I need to think, no know in my head that my guy will behave appropriately and clearly hitting on an obviously single, available and interested in meeting a guy girl for an extended period of time, crosses the line, for sure. And I am fairly certain that every girl out there would agree. You wouldn’t want us to do it to you!

So, here’s some words of advice for the married men, if you are really only innocently flirting or trying to talk to some interesting new people as I heard one scumball, I mean married man say to a woman he was talking to, this one was married with 3 kids and visiting from Washington DC. You owe it to the single woman to be clear quickly that you are married and unavailable. This doesn’t mean you have to say, "Hi, I’m Bob and I’m married" or have it branded on your head, but it does mean that within the first 5 to 10 minutes of the conversation you delicately drop it in so that if the single girl is actually out on a Thursday night trying to meet someone available, she can excuse herself instead of waste her precious time on you.

In addition, it is wholly inappropriate to stare lasciviously at a pretty single girl and smile at her if you really are only looking to make interesting new friends; what’s wrong with those new friends being of the male persuasion?

Or what’s wrong with have conversation with groups of new and interesting people as opposed to cornering one woman and have a one on one conversation with her if you really are only looking to meet new people? Nothing. But the question really is are you being honest about what you are doing?

There are a lot of women out there who will cheat with you, I would say its only fair to try to go after the ones who are like that instead of taking up the time of a single girl who had the diluted perception that you might be a good guy and you might be someone with whom she could be, sometime on the distant future interested in holy matrimony.

I am in the business of love and I help people get married so the whole cheating thing or innocent flirting thing really does not sit well with me…. Call me crazy!!!
Thoughts?

THE EXPLOSION OF LOVE!

The explosion of love.

I am sure you have all heard about it by now, but in case you are from outside of NYC...the craziest thing happened yesterday, right in my neck of the woods.

This guy, a cardiologist no less, placed explosives in the town home where he lived with his ex-wife in an effort to stop her from taking possession of the home! This happened on East 62nd St between Park and Madison on the upper east side of Manhattan. Apparently, the wife was granted the townhouse in the divorce settlement and the man decided that it would rather see it burn to the ground than allow her to have it.

He wrote in an email to her that "soon she would go from a gold-digger to a ash and rubble digger"- not a bad line! Apparently the couple lived there for their whole marriage and the guy also worked there. According to the news the guy was obsessed with the building and was planning to live in it until he died. The building actually exploded and fell straight to the ground (see photo) but fortunately no one was catastrophically injured and now the man is feeling remorse!

This makes me think about love and hate and how closely connected they are. If you have ever been in love or in hate you know what I am talking about- the emotions are so diametrically opposed yet feel almost identical, right? Love is this giddy, sweet happy feeling while hate is this blood-boiling seething feeling yet the height of the emotions are the same, just as strong, just as intense and just as all consuming. And they say that you can only hate someone or something you actually loved, otherwise you probably just dislike it strongly, not hating it.

And they say (whomever they are) that you really can't love an inanimate object that you can only feel affection for it, desire it or really enjoy it, whereas people you can love.

So I wonder if the press is right, did this guy explode the building because of his love of the building or did the building just symbolize his actual love of his wife? Maybe this crazy doctor was just a love sick guy who didn’t know how to reign in his emotions so he snapped and acted in a fit of desperation or maybe he is just crazy. What do you think?

I HEARD THIS ON THE RADIO YESTERDAY...

Here's a quickie and non-dating related...

What is something that kids of this generation have never enjoyed but their parents enjoyed all the time????